(Excerpt from "How to Identify and Avoid a No Good Skeezer")That phrase is used quite commonly with women and most (not all) don’t know what they are talking about.
First of all remember that you don’t meet a woman and she automatically becomes your wife. If you are not swayed by her looks then you should know that there is a process that she should follow before she becomes wife potential. I will move from the phrase backwards to help you out if you don’t know.
1. Before she can become your wife she has to DISPLAY wife-like qualities.
2 Before she can display wife-like qualities she has to KNOW what those qualities are.
3. Before she can know what those qualities are she has to LEARN those qualities.
4. The way to learn those qualities is to be TAUGHT by a knowledgeable, unselfish and sane male, female or group.
5. Before she can be taught those qualities she has to have the proper ATTITUDE.
Many women will have grown up with a selfish attitude and will have not been taught what wife-like qualities are. What most of them do know about being a wife was probably learned through direct observation at home of an emotionally damaged female that made selfish or poor choices in choosing a mate and will now blame the mate or ex’s for her dismal situation.
She may also have been negatively influenced by selfish and controlling women in dysfunctional relationships which typically have the man as a financial and material provider of her immature and selfish demands. That man will usually just give her what she wants to temporarily shut her up. Those types of females are usually never satisfied and the best thing he could do for himself is leave home and never return.
Until she can display those wife-like qualities on a consistent basis all you have found is a thing. You don’t know how good that thing is or if that thing is a good woman that can potentially become your wife or just another skeezer that will eventually become a physical, emotional and financial burden.
Unless you are foolish you should never allow her to bring stress or debt into your life because she will expect for you to help partially or totally bear her burdens. Just being a female does not qualify her to be your wife.
Good stuff here man... I heard you on the relationship playbook... I run http://blackfolkhotspots.com and I would like to get you on my show... hit me up when you get a minute 219-512-9910 --Ryan
ReplyDeleteWow is all that I can say. I got to this page through your facebook posting. I wish that I had read this 2 years ago since I see it was posted in 2008. If so, I would have never married the woman that I married. I remained married for 16 months and 14 of them was nothing but disappointment. I could not take any more of her selfish attitude and irresponsible behavior so I got out and have never looked back.
ReplyDeleteI am 28 years old and if I ever get into a situation of thinking about marrying someone again I will definitely take what you have stated into consideration. I am going to share this with my other male friends so hopefully they won't make the mistake that I did. I am going to read some of your other blogs. Keep up the good work.
Jai Duval put a link to a JDuval approved "The Ultimate Wife Handbook" then. Want to know if your definitions are narrow or open.
ReplyDeleteAgrees with Display, Know, Learn, Taught, Attitude because it is applied also to men.
Btw, great observation! :)
ReplyDeleteExcellent post! I wish someone with this perspective had been in both my older brother's life and myself growing up.
ReplyDelete