DISCLAIMER (to the idiots and morons)
I don't think you will get it but go ahead and give this your best shot anyway (lol)
END OF DISCLAIMER
In some cases, I believe that I need to begin with definitions to assist in eliminating confusion or confrontation with IDIOTS and MORONS.
(Definitions)
ATTITUDE - (1) A settled way of thinking or feeling, typically reflected in a person's behavior. (2) Someone who is concieted and thinks of themselves too highly.
SUBMISSIVE - (1) One who gives over their rights, their desires, and themselves to another. (2) Allowing others to have control over you.
(End of Definitions)
Before I begin I want to share this brief dialogue between myself and a BLACK MAN regarding a cartoon which led to me posting this. I removed his name because it's not the name that is important, it's HIS mentality and what results from it.
(Dialogue)
(His Response) No. You don't need to know how i'm thinking.
(End of Dialogue)
MY COMMENT
There is a whole lot of confusion and misinterpretation with those two words as it applies to male and female interaction and especially with certain people. I believe he has aligned himself with item (2) of each definition above.
In this case, definitions number (2) has become normal and accepted while number (1) has become abnormal and ridiculed by MANY of YOU PEOPLE. I don't think I need to pull out "THE CARD" to let you know who I'm talking about.
As you can see, in the dialogue above, there is a refusal to clarify one's self when asked to do so. You still wonder why a majority (not a minority) of a certain people are plagued with confusion and confrontation? This is why I choose to LIMIT "my time with" and "my exposure to" people who think and behave in this manner.
Some people simply love attitude and the confusion and confrontation it produces. Are they wrong for doing so? Absolutely not.
I have also heard many of those same types of people say, "I love a man/woman that is a challenge" which typically means "someone that will foolishly argue with me and not do as I request". Believe it or not, this is a MENTALITY that exists in EXTREMELY LARGE numbers with a certain group of YOU PEOPLE.
QUESTIONS (for YOU PEOPLE)
1. How did you get to this IRRATIONAL mental state?
2. Why would YOU consider someone to be submissive (as defined in number (2)) simply because they listen to you and do as you request (not demand)?
3. Why do YOU consider someone that RESPECTS YOU and HONORS your request to be someone you are controlling?
4. Why do YOU consider someone that RESPECTS YOU and HONORS your request to be a "pet"?
5. Why would YOU not want someone in your life that listens, RESPECTS YOU and HONORS your request?
6. Did you ever think that person submitting to YOU does so because they realize that YOUR REQUEST makes sense so they comply?
7. Why would you want someone that is a so-called "challenge" to you? Don't you have enough sense to make YOUR career or YOUR ability to learn and improve the quality of your life enough of a challenge?
CONCLUSION
You still wonder why I have made a conscious decision to avoid many of YOU PEOPLE and especially females with ATTITUDE?
We all have the right to choose how we think, how we behave and the people we want to associate with as long as it is legal whether it makes RATIONAL sense or not.
Do you perfer "HER bad attitude and confrontation" over "HER cooperation and submission"?
I'm interested in your comments so, "Let's Talk About It..."
I hear you brotha. I have never heard the stuff that you are writing. I love what you are doing. I am going to read some of your other blogs. Continue to spread the word because we men really need something like this to wake us up.
ReplyDeleteYou are the idiot. Just because me and my man argue a lot does not means something is wrong with our relationship. Some people have different ways of showing there love. Arguing brings us closer together. Why don't you get a live and stop trying to cause problems in relationships.
ReplyDeleteTrue. Different strokes for different folks.
DeleteI am sending this to my brother. This is some good stuff.
ReplyDeleteUnderstand all your questions. I think dominance-submission is a highly personal thing. I have a very alpha-male energy as in I go for what I want in life and am generally fearless and most men sense this and hesitate to make a move on me. However, my demeanor is often described as girlish and young and my guy calls me his "little girl".
ReplyDeleteOne day I saw the shock on my guy's friend's face when my guy asked me to clean his feet (he had a bandage and some dirt stuck to it) and I bent down, got a wet towel and just did it right there. Then I realized oh, women don't do that sort of thing anymore i.e a guy says go do something, she does it.
Subtler than that I always accommodated my guy's schedule and my girlfriend hates to see that - she says he snaps his finger and I obey.
It's bewildering to a lot of people that someone as confident and whatever adjectives they wanna use would "submit" and let him "control" me. Except I don't think he controls me at all coz I'm doing what I want to do.
It has nothing to do with seeking his approval; rather, it's about enjoying a sense of peace and co-operation, a sort of give and take, etc.
People define things based on their preconceived understanding of a word. Until one lives the thing itself one really doesn't know the thing. It doesn't mean they are wrong - it just means they're coming from a different experience than you are or I am.
Actually, I kind of admire what is generally known as black women's "attitude" i.e don't take any "shit" sitting down, strong-willed, calculative, sharp and powerful words, etc. I'm sure some Asian women can be like that too.
ReplyDeleteAs rice-eating Asian putting myself in black women (or men's) shoes I can totally get why the word "submission" and "control" leaves a bad taste in people's mouth. It alludes to repression, denial of one's thoughts,feelings or 'rights'.