Wednesday, June 26, 2013

JAI DUVAL PRESENTS: The Great Kings and Queens of America

It is difficult enough just being an EVERYDAY person trying to get or  hold down a job so I find it quite amusing when EVERYDAY people with NO ROYALTY EXPERIENCE or NO HIGH LEVEL LEADERSHIP SKILLS will PROMOTE themselves to such a HIGH LEVEL position of responsibility as a King or Queen.



[DISCLAIMER]

This DOES APPLY to everyone male and female WANNA-BE king or queen.

[END OF DISCLAIMER]

Why can't people simply ACCEPT themselves to be NO MORE or NO LESS than the rest of us EVERYDAY, (hopefully) WORKING people? 

I laugh to myself when I hear males talk about looking for their queen. I would think that it would be MORE SENSIBLE to look for a partner that will WORK WITH YOU as opposed to a queen that EXPECTS you to do work for her.

[WHO CAN CLAIM THE TITLE]

KING:

- IF you reign over a country you ARE A KING 

- IF your first name is King you can be CALLED KING 
- IF your last name is King you can be CALLED A KING (ex: Martin Luther, Don or Rodney)

Otherwise, I'm going to call you DUDE.

QUEEN:

- IF you reign over a country or married to a King you ARE A QUEEN
- IF your first name is Queen you can be CALLED QUEEN (ex: Latifah)
- IF your last name is Queen you an be CALLED A QUEEN

- IF you ONCE WAS a male and had THE CHANGE you can be CALLED A QUEEN

[WHAT DO AMERICAN KINGS AND QUEENS DO]

American Kings:

- Use EBT cards
- Live on Section 8
- Have car payments
- STRUGGLE with bills
- Live with their parents
- Have baby mama issues
- RIDE public transportation
- Have regular job or unemployed
- Apply for unemployment benefits
- Live in an apartment and pay rent
- PRETEND to be someone they aren't
- Live in a house and/or have mortgage payments
- Go to his friends and complain about his woman
- HANG OUT in clubs or other places TALKING SHIT and CHASING PUSSY.

American Queens:

- Use EBT cards
- Live on Section 8
- GET KNOCKED UP
- Have car payments
- STRUGGLE with bills
- Live with their parents
- Have baby daddy issues
- RIDE public transportation
- Have regular job or unemployed
- Apply for unemployment benefits
- Live in an apartment and pay rent
- PRETEND to be someone they aren't
- HANG OUT in clubs hustling free drinks
- HUSTLE MEN for free dinners and dates
- Prance around with their CLEAVAGE exposed
- Live in a house and/or have mortgage payments

- Go to the authorities trying to get child support payments
- Wear weaves that DO NOT RESEMBLE their own hair texture
- Become a public embarrassment with loud, profane behavior
- Fuck a deadbeat and FALSELY claim the child is for someone else
- Have OVERWEIGHT bodies and run around claiming how sexy they look

- Can't keep the same PHONE NUMBER cause they DON'T PAY or CAN'T FIND A FOOL TO PAY their phone bill

[WHAT DO SENSIBLE, RESPONSIBLE EVERYDAY PEOPLE DO NOT DO]

They DO NOT DO any of the above.

[WHY DO THEY PRETEND TO BE KINGS AND QUEENS]

I have no idea. The next time you see someone claiming to be a King or a Queen, ask them.

[CONCLUSION]

Are you one of those pretentious types? Have I upset you? You can put your crowns back on your heads and RETURN to your kindom.

Class is dismissed.

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